A wise woman...

   A wise woman once said to me, "bigger kids, bigger problems".  At the time my children were in middle school, hers were infants.  I laughed out loud as I mulled over the small issues I had at this point with my 2 red headed angels;  scrapes, bumps, so and so doesn't like me, what's for dinner? can I go to the movies with so and so and her mom,?can someone come over to play?...the list was pretty boring.  Fast forward to year 2011 <sigh>.  My angels are now a Junior and Senior in high school.  The hum drum issues I had a few years back have really changed.  I now have these; can I go to prom? can I stay out late? can I drive to Illinois with my friends? I am going to college in CALIFORNIA, how do I balance a checkbook? where do I go to pick up my prescription?  These seem like pretty normal end of teen year questions and dilemmas, however, my mind is spinning out of control > Did I set a positive example?  Will they make the right choices about drugs, alcohol, sex?  Will they give into peer pressure? Are they wearing their seatbelts? Do they get into cars with people who have been drinking? Do they have a strong enough voice to say no? Are they kind, considerate and caring to others? Will they succeed? Are they happy with who they are? Have they learned from my mistakes? Are they ready to be on their own?

   No one told me that parenting would be so painful.  I think back to the toddler years when both my children had some minor health issues which required quite a few minor surgeries.  At that time I thought the world was coming to an end.  That feeling has now tripled in my heart.  How will I ever let them go and feel that they are safe in this big, unpredictable world?